The door to her bedroom was sealed shut. Alexis sat on the edge of her bed, hands posed on her lap as though she were praying. And maybe she was. Her life was about to change in twenty four hours, and yet remain the same. There was nothing that would visibly change after a ring was on her finger. That was something Ned didn't understand. She would still be Alexis Davis, with all the baggage of being a Cassadine, and her career would remain intact. But she was also going to be his wife. A member of the Quatermaine family. It was all becoming increasingly hard to accept.
Her dress was hanging on the back of the door; white silk spilling down onto the carpet. Alexis titled her head to the side to admire the gown. It was beautiful, and she felt so selfish for thinking it wasn't beautiful enough. So disturbed for thinking it was too beautiful for her.
Just as her heavy eyes drifted toward the clock to see that it was much later than she thought, the buzz of the doorbell startled her. Alexis let it ring once more before standing up and crossing the floor. She ran down the stairs, her pony tail bouncing wildly against her neck. "Ned," she sighed his name as she swung the door open. "Hi."
He flashed a dimpled grin and reached out to hold his hands against her hips. Ned's lips brushed over her neck and he murmured something she didn't hear against her skin. He looked up to meet her gaze and asked, "Did I wake you?"
Alexis shook her head. She leaned forward, placing a quick kiss on the bridge of his nose. "I was awake. Just thinking."
"About the wedding?" Ned winked, pulling Alexis with him toward the couch.
She shrugged when he wasn't looking. "About a lot of things," she clarified. She sat beside him, hugging a pillow to her chest.
"Zander Smith?"
She nodded. "His trial is in a less than a week," she told him, rolling her eyes. Alexis shifted on the couch until she had her own space, room to stretch her legs out in front of her. "I was thinking how nice it would be to have a wedding when the wedding is the only thing on my mind."
Ned bit his lip, casting his eyes down at the ground. He could never look at her when she started to talk negatively about their wedding. "Are you trying to tell me something?" he asked, managing a smile as he spoke.
"No," she assured him, reaching forward to take his hand. "I was just making conversation. It would be nice to have a honeymoon right after the wedding. That's what I was thinking about."
He let go of her hand. Ned stood up, stuffing his hands deep inside his pockets. He circled around the sofa and back again, looking down at her. "We could have that, you know. You could drop the case."
"Ned. I can't do that. Not this late in the game."
"You could. Ask someone you trust... ask Scott Baldwin to take over. He'd understand." Ned knelt down in front of her and draped his arms over her thighs. "We're getting married, Alexis."
She nodded and said, "I know that! I've got the wedding dress and flowers and the butterflies in my stomach to prove it."
Ned sighed, dropping his chin to his chest. It was silent, awkwardly silent, for a moment before he stood up. He held his arms at his sides, exhausted and frustrated. He looked at her and shrugged. "I don't know, Alexis. Sometimes I feel like you'd rather not have the dress and the flowers and the butterflies are more serious than you let on."
"What's going on?" Alexis asked after a beat, following him with her eyes as he paced the floor. "Ned?"
He turned suddenly. "Is this really what you want?"
Alexis stood up. The pillow she had been clutching slipped to the ground. She stood in front of Ned, tepidly pressing her palms to his chest. "I love you," she told him. "I'm just scared and nervous." She was doing her best to convince him and herself, but she was failing.
"I know you love me, Alexis. And I love you. But we don't have to be married to love each other."
She nodded and then shook her head. "This is... we've come so far. Tomorrow is our wedding day. We're both nervous and having this conversation now-"
"Makes sense," he spat, pulling away from her. "If we don't have this conversation now, we'll be having it tomorrow in front of our guests and a minister."
"You shouldn't have come here." Alexis stooped to pick up the pillow, roughly tossing it onto the couch.
Ned followed her as she circled around the room, straightening piles of books on the table and carrying dirty dishes to the kitchen. "Why? Because then we could pretend like everything is perfect?"
"No." Alexis covered her face with her hands. She rubbed her eyes and her temples, wondering if she could turn back time and let the doorbell continue to ring while she pretended to be asleep or in the shower. "No, because then you wouldn't be pissing me off so much," she shouted. She flinched at her tone, at her words. Before Ned could say anything, she grabbed his arms and said, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I just know that when I wake up in the morning, the only thing I'll be able to think about is becoming your wife. But right now I need to be crazy and worried and sick, and I need to do all of that on my own. Can you understand? Please?"
He relaxed, easing under her touch. "Yes. I'm sorry. Can we forget about this?"
Alexis nodded and took his hand as they walked to the door. She hooked her arms around his neck, relishing the moment of silence that passed between them. "I'll see you tomorrow."
"At the church."
"In my dress."
Ned smiled warmly, holding a hand to his chest. "I do love you, Alexis."
She grabbed the collar of his jacket and pulled him back inside the room, firmly pressing her lips to his. Ned tried to wrap his arms around her waist, but Alexis pulled away and began closing the door. Before it sealed shut, she whispered, "I love you."
Alexis leaned against the closed door and knew that Ned was doing the same. She smiled, but only for a short while. Her eyes drifted to her hand, to the finger where she would soon be wearing a ring. A gold band. She groaned, knowing that Ned was not doing the same. And that was the problem.
~*~
Zander Smith had been waiting for his visitor for fifteen minutes. He knew because the only thing to look at besides the gray walls and the gray table was the clock above the door. He rolled his eyes and thought about calling to the guard, even though they would demand he should wait because he has nothing better to do.
They heavy door slowly opened. Zander swallowed hard when he recognized the tall, burly man dressed in black. He didn't know his name, but he knew his face and his steel gray eyes. "What do you want?"
The man sat at the edge of the table, towering above Zander. He waited until he knew Zander was frightened into paying attention, and then he leaned down so that Zander could even smell the cigarette smoke and whiskey lacing his breath. "You plannin' to testify against Sorel, aren't you?"
Zander nodded. "I have to."
"Really? Well, then. Lemme just give you a warning, Mr. Smith. If anything happens to someone you know, it's your fault. If anything happens that leaves you feelin' guilty, it's just the start a things. You keep that in mind." He patted Zander's cheek before standing up and crossing the room, banging his fist against the door to be let out.
Zander leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes. He thought about Emily. He folded his hands over his lap and prayed that she was safe.
~*~
She held her hands against her stomach and smoothed her palms over the curves of her hips. The satin of her dress was cool against her skin. Alexis turned from side to side, admiring the way the bottom of the dress tapered into a small train at the back. She faced the mirror. Her eyes were screwed into two tiny slants, puzzled and awkward.
"What's the matter?" Carly asked from across the room, sealing the door shut behind her. "You look like you're about to throw up."
Alexis rolled her eyes. She shrugged a shoulder and turned to face her matron of honor. "I am about to throw up."
Carly reached for a plastic bag on the floor. She held it open and said, "Just don't get anything on my dress. Should I get Chloe or something?" Carly moved toward the door, but Alexis shook her head. Carly smiled and exchanged the bag for a bouquet of flowers. She slipped the pale pink roses into Alexis' hands. "It's almost time. Any final thoughts?"
"Yes," Alexis told her. She held the flowers close to her face, breathing in the subtle perfume. She clutched the bouquet to her chest and said, "Is it wrong for me to be so scared right now? I mean, this is a big deal. What if after we're married, I still feel uncomfortable and unsure? Do you think I'm making the right decision? Am I making a mistake?"
Carly sighed, offering a sympathetic smile. She walked toward Alexis and held a hand against her back, ushering her to a chair at the corner of the small room. She waited until Alexis sat down and knelt on the ground beside her. "I married my husband so I wouldn't have to testify against him. I wasn't exactly a blushing bride, if you know what I mean. But look at me and Sonny. We're happy together. You and Ned have been in love for a long time. Do you love him right this minute?"
She nodded. "I do."
"Then say that to him, not me. Marry the man you love."
Alexis stood up. She swallowed hard, her mouth dry and her throat parched. "That sounds so simple, doesn't it?" she asked aloud, not looking at Carly. She set her bouquet on the chair and closed her eyes. "I can't do this. I promised to never lie to Ned, and if I marry him... it'll be the biggest lie I've ever told." She opened her eyes and looked at Carly, her eyes begging for some kind of encouragement. Some kind of answer.
Carly pursed her lips together, at a loss for words. She walked toward Alexis, standing at her side. She held a hand over her shoulder and said, "There's not much time."
"I know," Alexis nodded. She turned to face the door, taking a deep breath before turning the knob. With Carly following cautiously behind her, she walked softly across the polished wood floor. She stood at the doorway leading to the church, trying to hide herself from the eyes of her friends and family, and from Ned at the altar. She turned around suddenly and leaned against the wall. "I can't do this to him!"
Carly held a finger to her lips, warning Alexis to lower her voice. She offered a sympathetic smile and whispered, "What would be the bigger lie, Alexis? Marrying Ned or calling it off?"
Alexis met Carly's concerned gaze. She laughed under her breath, amazed that Carly could understand her at all. Without a word, Alexis moved one foot in front of the other and stood at the entrance to the church. She grabbed a handful of her dress, lifting the white satin so that it wouldn't drag on the ground. She passed Stefan at the doorway. He sucked in a ragged breath when he realized what was about to happen.
When Ned saw Alexis making her way down the aisle with no flowers and no music, his throat closed in until he couldn't breathe. His arms hung limply at his sides. The closer she got to him, the more he felt like he couldn't move. The guests all shifted in their seats to watch his reaction. His eyes fell shut but he could still feel her standing before him.
"Ned." Alexis wondered if he even heard her say his name. She could feel the eyes of her family, the Quatermaines, her friends and her so-called friends boring into her. She tried to extend her arm toward him to take his hand, but her limbs felt too heavy to move. "I'm sorry," she whispered, the words rasping across her lips.
"Sorry. Sorry." Ned squeezed his eyes shut even more. He clenched his hands into fists. He flinched when Alan stepped forward and held a hand over his shoulder. "Don't," he spat, turning to look at Alan. His eyes quickly scanned the sea of shocked and not so shocked faces. He looked at Alexis and before the tears stinging his eyes could streak his cheeks, he brushed past her.
Alexis let go of her dress. She walked briskly down the aisle, trying not to look at anyone. Stefan reached out and curled his fingers around her arm, but she lurched free of his grasp. "Ned," she called out to him as he ran to the front doors, kicking them open. "Ned, please!"
"How could you do this?" he shouted at her, raking his fingers through his hair. "How could you walk down that aisle, in front of our families and friends, and..."
"Ned, you didn't even give me a chance to say anything," Alexis sighed, realizing she wasn't making much sense.
He rolled his eyes. "I knew what you were going to say, Alexis. It was written all over your face. How could you do this?"
She shrugged. "I'm so sorry, Ned. I was thinking about the conversation we had last night and about our future and-"
"You decided it's not for you? That you're better off without me?"
"Ned! I don't know what I'm doing." Alexis held her hands over her face, her tears soaking into her palms. "Just because I don't want to get married doesn't mean I don't love you. It doesn't mean I don't want to spend my life with you."
He sighed, trying to calm himself down. "You were obviously thinking about this a lot. You couldn't have said something sooner? Like before our wedding day?"
"I tried," Alexis hollered, her anger finally breaking through. "I tried so many times, Ned. But you were so set on this wedding. I hated crushing your hopes."
"What do you think you're doing now, Alexis?" he asked her, his eyes flashing with anger and betrayal.
Her lips moved, and she felt the salt of her tears against her tongue. But she couldn't talk. She had no explanation to offer him, at least not that he wanted to hear. Alexis grabbed his hands, holding them tightly inside hers. "I do love you, Ned," she told him, her vision of him blurred through the moisture glazing her eyes.
Ned's words were muffled by the screeching of tires. They both turned their heads to see two cars skidding down the street, leaving marks on the road as they made a sharp turn toward the church.
Inside the church, everyone's heads turned at the sound. Sonny rose from the pew and pushed past Carly. He jogged down the aisle and pushed Stefan out of the way. By the time he made it to the doors, it was too late.
A tinted window on each of the cars was rolled down a crack. Before everything could even register in their minds, the sound of gunfire reached their ears. Just as a bullet tore into Alexis side, blood spidering on the satin of her white dress, Ned threw his body over hers. He shook violently as a bullet settled into his back, and then another. His head fell against Alexis' stomach, his hands clutching at her dress.
She tried to sit up. Alexis moved her arms and held her hands against his back, ignoring the pain shooting through her body. The sounds and images around her were all a blur. Stefan knelt at her side, brushing his fingers through her hair and cradling her head on his knee. Sonny and Carly held each other, his lips trembling as he said a silent prayer. Alan broke through the crowd to attend to them, and someone's shrill voice was yelling, "Call and ambulance!"
Alexis whispered his name into the air, "Ned." Just as she felt his thick, sticky blood against her hand, she lost consciousness and her world went black.
~*~