Part IV
Helena admired how well her hand fit inside the leather glove. She turned her wrist from side to side. She listened to the quiet crackling of the material as her fingers clenched and unclenched. Smiling to herself, she took hold of the gun wrapped inside a white cloth. Alexis' blood stained the fabric. That brought her even more joy.
At first, Helena had been furious that Luke Spencer was early enough to save Alexis' life. But, magically, it worked to her advantage. Everything was beginning to fall into place and further her plans. The very people trying to outsmart her were digging their own graves, saving her the trouble.
She dropped the gun inside a plastic bag. Helena beckoned to one of her guards. She let him carefully take the bag from her hands. She squared her eyes and said, "You know what to do with it."
~*~
During her career as an attorney, Alexis had only surveyed two crime scenes. The hallway that led to her suite, her home, resembled both of them. The police department had neglected to clear the area of the yellow tape marking it the scene of an attempted murder. She could still smell the harsh cleansers housekeeping had used to clear the carpet of her blood. Her nose and eyes began to burn, and Alexis quickly spun away from the door.
She grabbed Jax's hand and led him back to the elevator. "Remember that offer you made earlier?"
He nodded. "For you to stay in the penthouse?"
"Does that still stand?" Alexis asked sheepishly, avoiding his eyes.
"I want you to feel safe, Alexis," Jax told her, cupping her chin with the tips of his fingers. He lifted her head until she looked into his eyes and smiled. "But I also want you to be comfortable. And I'm getting the feeling that living with me would do just the opposite."
She shook her head. Alexis wrapped her fingers around his hand. "I'm not uncomfortable with you, Jax. I think being your roomie again would be the best thing for me. If I'm alone, all I will do is think, think, think." She playfully punched her fist against his bicep, winking as she asked him, "So, are you going to make me beg?"
"No," he laughed, bending down to take hold of her bag. "I just have one condition." Alexis tilted her head to the side, her eyes posing a question. He grinned and said, "It's not what you're thinking! We have to talk about, you know, everything. Not right now, but soon. If I've learned anything it's that waiting only leaves you with more problems that need to be talked about."
Jax bent his arm. Alexis pressed the "up" button on the elevator and slipped her arm through his. They stepped inside as the doors slid open. "I can handle talking," she finally said, watching the numbers light up as the elevator careened upwards. "But I have a condition of my own."
"What?" Jax groaned, afraid to hear her answer.
"You have to make a big bowl of popcorn as soon as we get upstairs."
~*~
Stefan wore a path in the carpet, walking from one end of the room to the other. He repeated his steps again and again. His legs were stiff and he hardly bent his knees as he moved. He crossed one arm over his chest, his other elbow propped up on his wrist. He held his chin in his palm, stroking the rough hairs that covered his face. His eyes were angry slants and could not focus on any one thing; they made as well have been closed. All Stefan could see were flashes of light, images of his mother, sister and the boy he could only know as his son.
He formulated thoughts of revenge, all the while telling Nikolas that vengeance was a vicious circle that should die out in their hands. There were many options available, he told himself. The only one that seemed probable, and permanent, was ending Helena's life. He had been practicing for it his entire life.
His feet skidded to a stop. Stefan dropped his arms to his sides and glared at the doorway as Luke suddenly came into view. "Spencer," he sneered.
Luke pointed to the worn carpet and said, "You know, contrary to popular belief, that isn't going to get you anywhere." He laughed and stepped into the room, tossing his overcoat onto one of the high back chairs. "I know what you're gonna say. How the hell did I get in here, right? Well, I can't tell you that. But I can tell you that no matter how much of an awakening almost losing Alexis was, you cannot retaliate. Understand?"
Stefan remained perfectly stoic. The carpet rustled beneath his heavy shoes as he moved to stand in front of Luke. "It was always my understanding that retaliating against my mother was one of your hobbies, Mr. Spencer."
Puzzled, Luke squinted. He took a step back to examine his nemesis. "Your mother?"
Stefan nodded. "Is there anyone else who so greatly desires the death of my sister? Anyone who would be callous enough to strip Alexis of her mother's ring, and then deliver it into my hands?" He shook his head slowly and said, "This was no doubt the work of Helena. I have every intention of seeking revenge. I would have expected you're blessing, unless you were hoping to do the deed yourself."
"Yeah," Luke shrugged. "I was hopin' you were sick of goin' after Helena's head. Wanted to take care of it myself." He turned away from Stefan for a moment. He had been positive that Alexis would tell her beloved brother every gory detail of her shooting. Luke had been prepared to pump lead into Stefan if he even seemed to be thinking about going after Lucky. He was beginning to think he should put more faith into Alexis. "But taking credit for Helena's demise is not the only reason I stopped by."
"What is?" Stefan asked as he moved to the other side of the room. He sat down behind his desk, impatiently tapping his short nails over the smooth wood.
Luke propped his foot onto one of the chairs, leaning down on his knee. "You know something about my son. You know that I have an invested interest in finding Helena, getting some answers from her and then squeezing the life out of her. So spill it, Cassadine. What do you know about my son?"
Stefan pursed his lips together. He crossed one leg over the other, folding his hands over his lap. "Obviously I know no more than you do. Yes, I do believe my mother is responsible for Lucky's apparent death. Yes, I had taken him away from her and then... lost him. But beyond that, Luke, I'm in the dark as much as you."
Grinding his teeth, Luke slapped his palm against the top of the desk. Loose papers shifted in their neat stacks while pens rattled and slid off the side. He kicked the chair over and began walking away. He stopped, surprised, when Stefan called out, "If I come across any information, I will be in contact with you."
"Huh?" Luke shouted, turning to face Stefan. "You're gonna help me?"
"No," Stefan shook his head. "I'm going to help Lucky. And my family."
~*~
Alexis let her body sink into the couch cushions. She reached for the quilt bunched into a ball at the end of the sofa. Unwrapping it, she draped the soft cloth over her legs and up to her chest. Her head bounced against the pillows, her hair splayed out behind her head. Alexis turned onto her side and watched Jax's sleeping figure on the other couch; a thin blanket was tangled around his long legs. He clutched a pillow to his chest. Jax's lips were parted, and she could hear the short gasps of breath he drew as he slept.
She smiled and decided she had made the right decision. As much as she wanted to be strong and prove she could be on her own, having her best friend five feet away was a much better feeling.
Her eyes fluttered open and closed. She tried to fight the desire to sleep, wanting to feel fully alive after so many days lying in a hospital bed. But the exhaustion was too powerful. The last thing Alexis saw before her eyes sealed shut was a large bowl, popcorn kernels scattered around the bottom.
~*~
He thought about going to the boxcar, but the risk of Elizabeth finding him there was too severe. Lucky considered sleeping beneath the docks. But so many of his memories took place there. So many people he once knew passed over and under those docks every day.
The bottoms of his feet were burning. His tennis shoes constricted around his feet, the thin socks he wore not enough to cushion his skin. Lucky stopped walking and stretched his legs. He held his arms in the air, twisting from side to side. He heard his stomach growl and glanced over his shoulder. He backed up until he could sit on a tree stump, clearing it of snow.
Lucky opened his bag and felt his mouth water in anticipation. He removed a large paper bag, digging his hand inside. He counted five bagels, two apples, and a bottle of water. He had never been so relieved as when he found loose dollar bills floating around the bottom of his knapsack, leftover money from the time he travelled to Europe with Helena.
Holding one of the bagels with both hands, Lucky opened his mouth. His teeth sank into the bread and tore away a large chunk. He chewed and swallowed, nearly engulfing the entire bagel at once. He found himself smiling as he took the last bite and felt his strength slowly returning. But as he looked around, the smile faded and he realized how alone and lost he was. The smallest joys he found throughout the day, a chirping bird or the sound of the water rippling as he tossed rocks into the lake, became meaningless every time he thought of Alexis and what he had done.
Scanning the stretch of grass and trees in front of him, Lucky stood and started walking again. His steps were wide and determined. He had no idea where he was going, but he couldn't wait to get there.
~*~
He knelt down beside the couch. Jax shuddered at the memory of crouching down beside her, praying to feel her heart beat. This time he knew she was breathing, too heavily. Alexis' chest rose and fell in an erratic rhythm. Her eyes fluttered behind her close lids, struggling to open. He could see her fighting to wake up, to escape whatever nightmare her mind was engaged in.
"Alexis," he called her name, gently shaking her. Her fist tightened around the blanket she was clutching. He cupped her cheek in his hand, patting her face. "Wake up, Alexis. It's okay."
Her eyes snapped open suddenly, darting around the room. They finally settled on Jax's face and she visibly calmed. Alexis kicked the blanket away from her body and sat up, holding a hand over her forehead. Her skin was sticky with sweat and strands of hair were plastered to her neck. She took several sharp breaths and cried, "It was awful."
"What was? What were you dreaming?" Jax asked, climbing onto the couch beside her.
She licked her dry lips, thinking for a moment. Everything was still a blur, but images were coming together and forming a whole. Alexis' eyes fixed on his face while her hand moved to find his. "It was awful," she repeated, shaking her head. "I was coming home to my suite. There was blood all over the carpet, but it wasn't mine. And it all lead to my mother's body." She stopped, her features softening. Alexis managed a weak smile and added, "There was also something about a purple cat scratching on my window, but I doubt that had anything to do with my mother. Or Helena."
Jax laughed and pulled her into a hug, rubbing his hands up and down her back. He sighed when he felt Alexis circle her arms around his waist and rest her head against his chest. "I was so busy worrying about your injuries, I didn't think about the memories it could stir inside you. I'm sorry," he spoke softly, his words muffled against her hair.
She pulled away enough to look him in the eye. "Sorry? You don't have anything to be sorry about, Jax. They aren't memories, really. I don't remember my mother's murder. I don't remember anything before or after it. But... I'm afraid that I'm going to start to remember."
He brushed his fingers through her hair, tucking loose strands behind her ears. He leaned forward and pressed a quick kiss against her forehead. "How about I get you a glass of water? And then we can talk until you fall asleep again, okay?"
Alexis nodded. "Thanks," she smiled, shifting on the couch as he got up. She pulled her legs to her chest, resting her chin on her knees.
As soon as Jax disappeared into the kitchen, there was an insistent knocking on the door. He came jogging down the stairs, water splashing over the rim of the glass he held in his hand. Jax stopped and looked at Alexis. She cowered away, pressing her body against the back of the sofa. "It's late," Jax called out, his tone angry and cold.
"So what," the voice on the other side answered back, continuously knocking.
Jax opened the door a crack and peered outside. "Luke, go away," he spat. "It's late. Alexis needs to rest."
"Let her decide what she needs." Luke pushed the other man to the side, bursting into the room. He glared at Alexis and said, "I need to speak with Natasha. Give us a minute. Alone."
Jax turned to Alexis. She thought for a moment and then shrugged. "It's okay," she told Jax, dropping her feet onto the carpet. "I'll be okay. Would you go downstairs and get me some of those sugar cookies?"
"It's the middle of the night," Jax reminded her gently.
"Please?"
He sighed angrily and searched the floor for his shoes. Jax grabbed his jacket from the coat rack and slipped it over his white T-shirt. "I'll be right back," he said, slamming the door on his way out.
"What are you doing?" Alexis shouted, pulling on stands of her hair. She reached for a pillow and held it against her face, screaming as loud as she could.
Luke chuckled and pulled the pillow away as her scream became a whimper. He tossed it onto the floor and threw his body onto the couch. The cushions bounced and he stretched his feet onto the coffee table. "I missed you," he answered her jovially. She rolled her eyes and Luke leaned closer to her. "What, you don't believe me? Ah, well. I just wanted to commend you."
"For what?"
"Independence. Courage. Smarts," he counted each virtue on his fingers. "The old Alexis would have run right to big brother and pointed the finger at a Spencer, even if he's just a kid. But you," he smiled widely, patting her hand, "you surprised me. I paid 'ol Stiff a visit and he doesn't seem to think my son had anything to do with shooting you. In fact, I didn't have to say anything 'cause Lucky's name was nowhere on his list of suspects. Simply put, you didn't tell him."
Alexis shook her head. She sank down on the couch, her head resting on the back edge. "I couldn't," she confessed, her voice shaking. "When someone hurts a member of Stefan's family, he doesn't care who it is... he'll make sure they never draw another breath. I figured it was better to let him believe it was Helena's finger pulling the trigger. The more people who want her dead, the better."
Luke nodded, resting on his side to face her. His eyes followed a bead of sweat dripping down her cheek and over the curve of her face. He noticed how her hands were trembling and how tightly she gripped a pillow to her chest. "Hey," he said, reflexively draping his hand over her knee, "you okay? You don't have a fever or anything, do you?"
She flinched when Luke pressed the back of his hand to her cheek. "No, I don't have a fever. I just... it's stupid."
"What?"
"I had a dream," she laughed.
Luke's eyes became serious, concerned. "I don't think it's funny, Tasha." He sat up, dropping down onto his knees. He folded his arms over her legs and looked straight into her eyes. He saw Alexis take a deep breath, holding it in. "You wanna make sure you never have another nightmare?"
She swallowed, releasing a breath. A tear slipped down her cheek. "Yes," she nodded.
"Then help me find my son. Help me kill Helena, for real this time." Luke held up his arms, shaking his hands. "No tricks up my sleeves, darlin'. You and me have the same agenda, the same desire. Help me find my son and get him the help he needs, and I promise Helena will never haunt your dreams again. Never."
"It never works," she said sadly, shrugging.
Luke leaned even closer to her. "That's 'cause we involve other people. We get mixed up in our own little worlds and lose sight of what's really important. I swear I won't go after your brother, nothin' like that. Just me and you, gettin' my son and gettin' rid of Helena."
"Just you and me? But-"
He clamped his hand over her mouth. "No," he told her firmly, "no one else. No Stefan. No Jax. No cops." He could see that she wasn't giving in. He dropped his hand to her lap, squeezing her hands inside his. "Please, baby. I'm down on my knees. We do this alone. If everyone and their sister gets involved, think of how many more people are at risk? But you and me, we know how she works. We can do this, Natasha. Don't you agree?"
Alexis dropped her chin to her chest. "Okay," she sighed, defeated. "I agree."
"Agree to what?" Jax asked as he opened the door, stepping inside.
Luke quickly moved away from her, standing up. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and leered at Alexis, his eyes menacing. She stood up from the couch and ran to Jax's side, accepting the box of cookies. She set them on the desk and pulled him into a tight embrace, swaying from side to side as he held her. "Nothing," she whispered. "I agree that it's late and Luke needs to go."
"Fine with me," Luke snapped, keeping his eyes locked with her's until the moment the door sealed shut.
"You okay?" Jax asked, his hands resting over her shoulders.
Alexis nodded and said, "Yes. Much better. Except now I'm wide awake." She took his hand and pulled Jax to the couch. They sat down, facing each other. "You know all those things we need to talk about? Is now okay with you?"
He smiled nervously, dropping his gaze to his hands. He picked at some cotton slipping out of a tear on the blanket. Jax finally answered her, "Now is great. Now is perfect."
"Okay." She drew in a sharp breath, speaking as she exhaled, "I cherish you're friendship, Jax. It's what I look forward to every day, what makes me happy. And I never want to lose that, for any reason."
Jax cleared his throat. "This is sounding like one of those-"
She pressed a finger to his lips, silencing him. He sat back and listened to her. "I trust you with my life, and I need you to trust me. I need you to trust that everything I do is to make... to make things better... and that I can fight my own battles."
"You think I'm crowding you?" He nodded and said, "I'm sorry. I know sometimes I do that. I'm just worried, and I feel better knowing I'm taking care of you. But I know you're strong, and I know you can take care of yourself."
"Thank you, but that's not really what I was going to say," she laughed. "I just wanted to say that I appreciate you taking care of me, but I need to be taking care of you too. Because I do love you, Jax." She took his hand, caressing his fingers and finally squeezing his palm inside her own hand. "You're the greatest friend I've ever had. I enjoy being with you."
He sat up on his knees, resting his free hand against her hip. "The feeling is mutual."
"And I just... I don't want us to do anything we'll regret. I don't want to jump into something we think we need, because letting things just happen... is... good... too." She found it harder to speak as his breath became warmer and closer to her face. Alexis' eyes fell shut and her lips parted of their own accord, inviting his soft kiss. She was sorry when it ended so quickly, yet thankful it didn't last any longer. "Like that," she smiled.
"I understand what you're saying," he told her quietly. Jax stood up, kissing the top of her hand. "Do you need anything before I go to bed?"
She shook her head. "Nope. I'm just going to sit here a while longer."
"Okay. You know where to find me," Jax said, walking toward the stairs.
"Jax," she called to him, craning her neck to see him. "Thank you."
He smiled and said, "My pleasure."
~*~