TITLE: Memoria
AUTHOR: Laura L.
SUMMARY: An alternate version of Lucky's return. Helena sends Lucky on an errand that will change the lives of Alexis, Luke, Jax and others forever.
RATING: R, for language, violence and other adult stuff:)
FEEDBACK: Yes, please! Send any comments here.
DISCLAIMER: The characters depicted are the property of ABC and anyone else associated with General Hospital. I'm just borrowing them for a while.

Memoria
by Laura

Part 1

"What do you mean you lost him?"

Stefan shut his eyes in shame. His muscles stiffened as he felt his sister's fingers circle around his arms, shaking him. He looked up, his firm lips pursed together. Stefan pulled out of Alexis' grip and took hold of her hands. "I left explicit instructions for Lucky's care. He was not to be moved. He was to be watched at all times."

Alexis rolled her eyes. "Did you ever think that maybe you should have been the one watching him! If Helena got her hands on Lucky again, you'll never be able to return him to Laura. She's not going to think you're a hero, Stefan," she shouted, her cheeks burning.

He felt Alexis' hands struggling to tremble inside his grasp. Their eyes met, glazed with tears. "Overreacting is not going to help anyone," he stated simply, gaining his composure.

Alexis' mouth fell open. She ripped her hands from his and shook her head. Her long, auburn hair flew wildly around her head. She pointed an accusing finger at him and said, "I am not overreacting! Lucky's life has been put on hold because Helena has some kind of diabolical plan brewing in that sick brain of her's. You were supposed to save him but all you did was put him right back into her hands, and give her even more of a reason to ruin what he has left of his life! You claim to be his protector but where were you when she lit that fire? Where were you when she got in that car and sped toward my friend?" The words left her mouth in one quick breath. Tears pooled in the corners of her eyes, streaming down her cheeks as she struggled to blink them back.

"God," Stefan muttered under his breath. He reached out, folding his arms around her back. He pulled Alexis into a tight embrace, rocking her in his arms. "This isn't just about Lucky."

She shook her head against his chest. Her tears soaked through his shirt and left black mascara stains on the gray cloth. Alexis gripped the material in her hands, needing to hold onto something. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I just... I can't... he's her prisoner." She lifted her head from his chest, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. She began to pace the room. "I never knew Lucky Spencer very well, I know. In fact, hardly at all. But he's young and good and nothing like her. He never got a say in what happened to him, in where he went. She controlled his life, Stefan! I don't have to imagine the horrendous things she has put that boy through. I'm pretty sure I know exactly what she's done."

Stefan stood behind her, inching his hands closer to her back. He circled his arms around her waist, pulling Alexis against his stomach. Her head fell between his neck and shoulder, and Stefan pressed his cheek into her hair. "You blame me for what happened to your friend? For what could have happened to you?" The question could have been snide, but Stefan asked with gentleness. He wasn't angry at her, even if her answer would be yes.

She shook her head and said, "Not really. I mean, you can't be my shadow... following me around everywhere. This is about Helena. This is about how she had no right to steal his life." Alexis paused, looking down at his arms and his hands hooked together around her waist. She sucked in a deep, ragged breath. "It's a little bit about me, too. I'm not responsible for what she did. In a way, it really has nothing to do with me. I'm not his mother or even a friend. But I feel like I should help him."

"It's only natural," Stefan spoke into her hair, closing his eyes as he inhaled her scent. "You've always felt like you were a prisoner in Helena's home. And you're a good woman, Alexis. How could you not feel for the boy? I promise you that he'll be in the safety of his mother's arms in no time at all. I will not let her hurt him." Stefan turned Alexis around in his arms, framing her wet cheeks in his strong hands. His thumb briefly stroked her lips. "I won't let her hurt you, either, Alexis."

She swallowed the nervous tension in her throat. Alexis' hands fell against his chest, her palm pressing against the medallion hanging beneath his shirt. "I believe you."

Stefan couldn't move his eyes from her's. His knees locked together and his breath caught in his throat. Three words hung from his lips, but he couldn't find the strength to say them. Instead, he bent down and covered her mouth with his. The kiss was longer than he had intended. He didn't see shock or shame in her eyes when he pulled away. Alexis nodded silently, dropping her hands from his chest. She turned on shaky legs, absently grabbing her purse from a chair as she walked to the door.

He watched her slip into the hall. Stefan sank down onto his desk, smashing papers and files. He reached for the phone and quickly dialed a series of numbers. "We need to locate Lucky Spencer immediately."

~*~

~Come
As you are
As you were
As I want you to be
As a friend
As a friend
As an old enemy~

The scenery passed by him in slow motion. Everything was gray and murky through the darkened window of Helena's limousine. Every landmark was a memory. Lucky had no desire to revisit them. They inhabited a part of his mind he didn't like to think about. Kelley's, the docks and his father's club belonged to a boy. He was a man with new memories to make, new and better goals to achieve.

Helena watched his face remain perfectly stoic, even as the limo drove by Elizabeth's house. He did look up to her bedroom window, but Lucky didn't flinch when he saw her lean against the cold, foggy glass. Helena's thin lips spread into a pleased smile and she patted her hand, sheathed in a warm velvet glove, against his leg.

When Helena first took him into her possession, Lucky was forced to watch his family and friends grieving for him. The grief soon became a deep seeded pain, and then struggling to move on. And slowly he wasn't forced to watch anymore, it was more for entertainment. He used to cry until he couldn't breathe and his body became consumed by exhaustion. Passing by so many memories, he didn't feel a sharp stab in his chest like he would have months ago. The images did nothing to him.

The limo came to a smooth stop. As soon as the car door opened, a gust of wind assaulted him. Lucky shivered and pulled his coat tighter around his body. He stepped onto the hard ground, facing the back of the Port Charles Hotel. He could remember hiding among the trees with his cousin, watching the lights flicker on and off as the rich patrons of Port Charles went to bed or woke up.

Helena snapped her fingers, breaking his trance. She lowered her hands onto Lucky's shoulders and forced his eyes to lock with her's. Her porcelain skin was illuminated under the light of the moon, and the diamonds in her ears reflected on the ivory snow covering the ground. "You remember what I told you?" Helena asked him, squeezing his shoulders as she waited for his reply.

Lucky nodded. "Yes," he stated, his lips barely moving.

"And I can trust you?"

He nodded again. "Yes."

"Good." Helena bent down, pressing a kiss against his temple. She left a stain on his smooth skin, an imprint of her blood red lipstick. "Now go on," she said, pointing at the back entrance to the hotel.

Lucky turned away, trudging through the thick snow. He stopped when he heard her metallic voice call out to him, "Oh, Lucky. If you start to have doubts about what you're doing, think of Elizabeth." Helena cackled to herself and beamed with pride as she watched him open the door and slip inside without being noticed. "A work of art," she said to herself.

~Take your time
Hurry up
The Choice is yours
Don't be late
Take a rest
As a friend
As an old memoria
Memoria
Memoria
Memoria~

~*~

~And I swear
That I don't have a gun
No I don't have a gun
No I don't have a gun~

Alexis' cheeks were dry and chapped from crying. Before she walked into the hotel, she made sure all traces of moisture in her eyes were gone. She was thankful to be alone in the elevator, taking several deep breaths to calm her rapidly beating heart. She stared at the numbers on the wall, stopping herself before she pressed the square button that would take her to the penthouse. She couldn't get used to living full time in her suite.

The doors spread open and Alexis stepped into the hall. She rummaged through her purse for her keys. Turning the key in the doorknob, she sighed, happy to finally be home. All she could think about was soaking in a warm bath, buried in soapy bubbles. She would call Jax to say goodnight and check on Chloe, and then settle in bed with a book. It sounded like the perfect way to end a stressful day. If she thought about Helena and Lucky anymore, her head was going to explode.

She tossed her keys and purse on the table, kicking her shoes across the floor. Alexis flipped a small lamp on. The light was dim, casting an orange glow on the carpet and walls. She shrugged the jacket from her shoulders, letting it pool around her feet. As she unbuttoned her shirt, letting it hang open, she stepped into the bathroom. Alexis lit several small candles and turned the faucet on, letting the steamy water fill the bathtub. She turned a bottle over, watching as the pink liquid became a bundle of fragrant bubbles.

Alexis walked into her bedroom. She tied her hair messily on the top of her head, loose strands hanging down and framing her face. She unhooked the button on her skirt, letting it fall down to the floor. The silk of her slip was cool against her legs as she walked to the phone, hitting a button and listening for the usual two rings before she heard Jax's voice. "It's me," Alexis sighed, removing her earrings and tossing them onto the dresser. "I'm about to take a bath, but I just wanted to say goodnight."

"Need some help?" Jax laughed, stretching his body across the sofa. He loved hearing her voice every night. Of course, it wasn't the same as having her in the room with him.

"No, but thank you. I might take you up on that offer some other day, though. Right now I just want to be alone."

Jax cleared his throat. "You okay, Alexis?"

She shrugged and paced back into her bedroom. Alexis heard a noise, like feet shuffling across carpet, coming from the other room. She leaned against the doorjamb, peering into the dimly lit room. "I'm fine, Jax. Just a little tired. But we'll have breakfast?"

"Of course."

"Good. Is Chloe there now?"

"She's sleeping."

Alexis felt a surge of anger sweep through her. It was quick, and she wasn't going to dwell on it. But it was there. She shook her head and smiled into the phone. "Okay then, Jax. Goodnight."

He pressed his lips to the phone, sending her a quick kiss. "Sleep well, Alexis. I'll see you in the morning."

She clutched the phone to her chest before dropping it onto the bed. Alexis heard the same noise and slowly made her way to the living room. "Hello?" She called out, feeling foolish. As she turned back to the bathroom, Alexis gasped and stumbled back against the wall. She clasped a hand to her mouth, agape in shock. "Lucky?"

He didn't move or say a word. He simply stepped away from the shadow he had been hiding under, arms hanging at his sides. Lucky felt a rush of power surge through his body. He had managed to not only break into her room, but remain quiet enough that she never knew he was there. He had watched her practically fall through the door, her entire body tense and angry. He had watched her undress, revealing only so much of her body. She was beautiful and sexy even when she was frustrated.

Lucky unconsciously licked his lips. He remembered the few times Helena made him watch a video of Elizabeth when she was in the privacy of her own room. She had managed to take something so innocent and beautiful and turn it into something sick and disgusting. Lucky's desire to love her became his desire to have her, to take her. Being gentle and sweet was only a memory.

"Lucky?" Alexis stuttered again, still too numb with surprise to cover herself. She stepped toward him, blinking her eyes several times. "How... what... who brought you here?"

He shrugged a shoulder, the first movement he had made.

Alexis held her shirt together, not noticing the quiet grunt escaping Lucky's lips. She walked even closer to him, moving her eyes from his shoes to his hair. He was dressed well. Not a wrinkle in his khaki pants or a tear in his silk shirt. He had changed so much, and tears stung her eyes as she realized just how much of his life he had missed. Lucky was no longer the boy she caught a glimpse of every so often at Kelley's or glued to his father's side. He was a man. His eyes were dark, his chin covered with just a stubble of hair. "God, Lucky," Alexis gasped, surprising even herself as she drew him into a tight embrace. "You need to sit down. You need to call your father. You're safe now. I won't let her hurt you. She can't ever hurt-" The words slurred in Alexis' throat when she felt something hard press against her skin, just below her chest.

Backing away from him, her eyes searched his. Lucky folded one side of his jacket open. He reached into the pocket and revealed a small gun, gripping it tightly until his knuckles were white.

Alexis opened her mouth but no sound emerged. She shook her head and held a hand in the air. Her heart began to pound inside her tight chest. She watched as Lucky's face twisted into something almost demonic. She recognized the small smile on his lips as the work of Helena. Alexis began to wonder if that was the expression on Helena's face as she slashed her mother's throat. "What are you doing?" She finally managed to ask.

Lucky moved his gaze down to her chest. With every shallow breath, Alexis' breasts moved and strained against the silk of her bra. The slip, which fell just above her knees, tangled around her legs. The sound of the water sloshing over the side of the tub filled the room. He took a deep breath, inhaling the fragrant soap that permeated the air. He wondered if that was how her skin smelt at that moment, and how it would look slick with the bath's soapy water.

"What are you doing?" She asked again, trembling.

"You've always hated my family," he finally spoke, his voice hoarse and small.

She shook her head. "No, that's not true."

Lucky moved closer, inching his feet across the carpet. Through the corner of his eye he could see the water cascading over the side of the tub and splattering on the floor. The steam made the air cloudy and slowly seeped toward them. "I don't really want to kill you," he confessed.

"You don't have to!"

He nodded. "Yes, I do. That's why I'm here. To kill Alexis."

She couldn't believe what she was hearing. A million thoughts began to crowd her mind; she could find an object to try and knock him out, some way to get the gun out of his hand, someway to call for help. Alexis brought her hands to her hair, pulling on the strands and loosening them from the clip. "No, Lucky. You don't have to do anything Helena tells you."

He offered a strangely sympathetic smile. In her mind, Alexis was right. But for him, she was far from the truth. He had to follow through on Helena's requests. If he didn't, his little sister would die. His mother would fade away. His father would be gone. Elizabeth's life would be drained from her, and he would have to watch it all until he was the only one left. Right now, they were only memories; the kind you could think of whenever you needed to. But if he didn't do what Helena asked, they would be dead memories. And he would be left with the guilt. Alexis didn't matter to him. Alexis wasn't supposed to matter to him. He was so confused, so lost.

Lucky slow, mechanically moved toward her. His hand shook as he brought it into the air, touching his fingers to her chest. He took hold of the gold chain that hung around her neck. Lucky fingered the sapphire ring that hung from the chain, the one he had been ordered to remove after the job was done. He pursed his lips together. Alexis trembled as he reached around her neck and found the clasp, the chain sliding down her shoulders as it fell into his hand.

"Please, Lucky. Stop."

Listening to her plead, he suddenly understood Helena's power. Alexis' life was resting in his hands. He stuffed the necklace in his pocket and moved back. He lifted the gun into the air, his hand steady. He pointed it at Alexis' stomach. She kept shaking her head and trembling. He bit into his bottom lip until he could taste his own metallic blood on his tongue. Smoothing his finger over the trigger, Lucky wanted to tell her to stand still. He wanted to tell her that if she would just stay in one place, he'd be careful so that the bullet would only graze her side. Helena had trained him to hit all the vital organs, but he would tell her Alexis wouldn't stop moving and he was afraid someone would hear them struggling, so he just shot.

Lucky's eyes locked with her's, wide and glistening with tears. He moved his arm to the side, aiming the gun at her hip. Alexis moved back, but she ran into the couch and fell against the cushions just as Lucky pulled the trigger. She screamed as the bullet grazed her hip. Her eyes begged him to stop, but Lucky could only hear Helena's words. "No one will hear," he said, his voice dripping with a venom Alexis knew was not his own. He pulled the silent trigger again and Alexis screamed as the bullet tore into her flesh, mere inches from the first wound.

She held her hand over the sticky blood. Beads of sweat penetrated her skin and wet her hair. She struggled for breath as the air drained from her lungs. Alexis' entire body shook in fear as Lucky stepped closer to her. He quickly pulled the shirt from Alexis' back, bunching it in his hand and pressing it against the wounds.

Alexis watched through blurry eyes as Lucky moved swiftly to the door. Like a trained expert, he ducked into the hall and was gone in a flash. Her eyes moved to the phone as she panted, trying to scream for help.

~Memoria
Memoria
Memoria
Memoria (don't have a gun)~

~*~

Lucky tucked the gun into his jacket. He ran down the stairs and burst through the back door. The limo was parked and the engine humming. He collapsed onto his knees, wiping Alexis' blood in the snow.

Helena rolled her eyes and opened the door, quietly calling him into the car. "Hurry." He looked up, stunned. He was drenched in sweat and all he could smell was Alexis' blood. All he could feel was the thick liquid covering his hands.

"Do you have it?" Helena asked harshly, holding her hand out.

Without blinking or saying a word, Lucky placed Alexis' necklace in the palm of her hand. He had no idea why Helena wanted it; perhaps a momento of Alexis' death. And then Lucky realized he didn't know if she would die. He didn't know if she had anyone who would care. Tomorrow, Alexis would only be a memory to him. Another thought to tuck away in his head. Maybe she would become a memory to the people who love her, or maybe someone will be there to save her from the burning pain, unlike the fire he had been caught in. The only person to save him from that was Helena. And now he joined her in the limo and wiped Alexis' blood with her pure white handkerchief, looking ahead as they drove away from all the memories.

~And I swear
That I don't have a gun
No I don't have a gun
No I don't have a gun
No I don't have a gun
No I don't have a gun

Memoria
Memoria~
~*~

"Come as You Are" by Nirvana

Part 2